


The View

by TigraNeona



Category: SKAM (France)
Genre: Conflict Resolution, Established Relationship, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-28
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:22:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24962221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TigraNeona/pseuds/TigraNeona
Summary: After a desperate search with a happy ending, Lucas and Eliott find themselves talking through some very difficult subjects in a very high building.  This is Eliott's point of view and set straight after 'Saturday 1:06AM - Sisters.'
Relationships: Eliott Demaury/Lucas Lallemant
Comments: 8
Kudos: 67





	The View

**Saturday– 01:30AM**

**Pleyel Tower – Floor 10**

  


Eliott took a final look around the messy area. The lower floors of the derelict building were the worst to look through; on a previous trip here, he had found most of them still held broken bits of office furniture and old storage units. There were more places for his missing friend to hide if she chose not to show herself. ‘LOLA?’ he called once more, with an eerie echo to his voice. There was no reply and everything was still. Feeling content that he had done all he could here, Eliott decided to move up to the 11th floor. 

  


As he entered the stairwell, Eliott’s phone buzzed with a message notification which he quickly viewed. 

Lucas – _Daphne just text and she’s got Lola. They’re both ok. Where are you?_

  


Eliott breathed a sigh of relief and slumped back against a wall. He thanked whatever gods he could think of that Lola was safe with her sister. Daphne had taken the middle floors and he searched the trickier lower ones, while Lucas had gone to the top floor to work his way down (since his last meeting with Lola had been a very difficult one, Lucas had said he would try and hide away if he spotted Lola and let Daphne know where to find her). Eliott quickly replied back. 

  


_Floor 10. Should we meet them?_

Lucas – _No Daphne has asked us keep out of the way, Lola doesn’t want to see anyone yet. They’ve called a taxi._

  


Eliott then heard footsteps above his head and quiet, echoing voices. He couldn’t make them out clearly but he knew straight away it was his two friends. He quickly moved out of the stairwell and back out of sight to hide in the shadows. He heard the sisters pass by and continue their journey to the ground. He pulled out his phone again and typed. 

  


_Let’s give them a few minutes. I’ll wait for you here_. A text returned a few seconds later. 

Lucas – _I’m not coming down yet. You go back to the apartment._

  


It took Eliott a moment to take in the message before replying. 

_Why?_ He waited impatiently for a response that didn’t come. 

_Lucas, what’s happening?_ _You know I won’t leave here without you!_ He then decided to call his partner instead. A text came back just before he did. 

Lucas – _It’s up to you. I can’t leave yet. I’m near the top, looking at the view. See you later.x_

  


One of the things that had drawn Eliott to Lucas in the first place was how surprising he often was. There were times, though, when Eliott found him less of a surprise and more of a puzzle. Right now, he couldn’t work out why his boyfriend had suddenly decided that being in this ruined old skyscraper was preferable to being back in their cosy apartment. A ‘view’ had never really interested Lucas before. Fear began to grip him. Running up the stairs from floors 10 to 39 was not really an option given how tired he was feeling, but Eliott took the stairs as quickly as he reasonably could. 

  


** 

  


‘When were you here before?’ 

‘Hmm?’ Eliott watched his partner carefully from where he stood trying to get back his breath in the doorway of the 39th floor. Lucas was standing right by the ‘balcony’, his profile barely visible except for the soft orange glow from the city lights that rose up and caught him. The wind was tugging at his wild brown hair and throwing it over his forehead. 

‘You knew the building from the photo Daphne had. I guess you came here doing Urbex.’

‘Y…yeah. Long time ago. Sofiane came with me.’ 

‘You did Urbexing with Sofiane?’ 

‘Only a couple of times. He wasn’t into it. He thought I would get him arrested.’ Eliott had meant it as a joke but instantly regretted it; after the events of last weekend, getting arrested was a touchy subject in the Demaury-Lallemant household. Still, he did see the trace of a smile on Lucas’s face. 

When he finally felt able to move again, Eliott slowly walked forward over the concrete floor. ‘Lucas, come on. Let’s go home, shall we?’ 

Lucas shook his head and look back out at the city below. ‘I need to clear my head. I don’t want to be there right now.’ 

Eliott stood next to him and gripped the stone wall. ‘Why?’ He paused. ‘Is it because of me?’

‘It’s…us.’ Lucas still looked away. ‘Tonight. These last few weeks. The things you have done, the things I’ve done, the way we’ve been tip-toeing around each other lately….I’m not sure what’s going on.’ 

‘You haven’t done anything wrong.’ 

‘Eliott, I was cruel to Lola. You were in bed when she came to the apartment, you didn’t hear. All I could see was how she was hurting you when I should have thought about her hurting herself too. And she could have thrown herself from this building because of things I said….’ 

‘Stop. You shouldn’t think that. Even if you were hard on her, if she had done the worst thing here tonight, it would never have been your fault.’ 

‘You can’t know that.’ 

‘Lucas, I’ve told you about me trying to end my own life in the past. It was never because of one thing or one thing someone said to me. It was a build-up of pain and hopelessness stretched out over time. Being desperate to get rid of them. Perhaps I shouldn’t speak for her, but I think that Lola has been in pain for many reasons, for a long time.’ Eliott noticed Lucas’s hand lying on the cold stone alongside his; he moved his own hand across slowly so that their little fingers were touching. ‘Sorry for mentioning me trying to…you know. I’m always afraid to upset you with that.’ 

‘You shouldn’t be,’ Lucas replied, quietly. Eliott sighed and blinked against the cold wind. 

Rain was starting to fall and blow into his face. ‘You’ve been through a lot because of what I did last week. I know you haven’t wanted to bring it up as I’ve been like a zombie for most of the time since, but I am sorry. That night at Mono got out of hand.’ 

‘Are you really sorry?’ Lucas asked, his tone suddenly sharper. ‘Maybe that night was a relief for you.’ 

‘What do you mean?’ 

‘Maybe you find life boring with me now and it was a relief to get wasted, even though you knew it would affect your medication. Is that it? You wanted to forget all about me because I’m no better than Lucille to you, not really. And maybe Lola is more interesting than me now? That’s why you wanted her in your film and why you wanted to spend time with her. I can only guess all this because like I said, I feel like I don’t know what’s going on anymore.’

Eliott paused, a lump forming in his throat. Lucas’s words had tumbled out so fast that he could hardly process them. It hurt to know that Lucas must have been bottling all this up and had finally reached the point where it had to spill out. Eliott reached out and took his arm. His partner shrank away from his touch at first. Eliott tried again and kept his voice calm for the sake of both of them. 

‘Lucas, my love…let’s just move inside out of the weather so we can talk properly. I know we’re both as dramatic as fuck but the rain isn’t going to help us this time.’ 

Some of the fire burned out of the smaller boy’s eyes and he smiled briefly. He let Eliott lead him away from the open air. 

  


** 

Eliott clutched the front of his black jacket closed for protection from the cold. He saw Lucas shuffle his feet nervously beside him. They both stared ahead to where they had just been standing, now from the safe distance of the sheltered area and sitting together on a large slab of concrete. They watched the rain falling fast and bouncing off the edge of the wall. 

‘I didn’t know you felt like this,’ Eliott said, breaking the silence that had fallen. ‘I forget we view things differently sometimes.’ He took a breath. ‘Listen, with Lola…when I first saw her at the funeral, she seemed a million miles away from everyone. I understood that. I’m in such a better place now with you, and even my family, that I thought I could help someone else having a bad time. The way things have turned out though, I suppose I was stupid to think that.’ 

Lucas shrugged. ‘You have helped her. I’m proud of you for that. I just didn’t want to be pushed out.’ 

Eliott looked across at his partner. ‘I wasn’t trying to do that at all. I asked her to do the film because I thought it would distract her from her problems and let you concentrate on the BAC. Also, you know I’m as dis-organised as fuck and left everything to the last minute to arrange. If the film upsets you I’ll delete it, honestly.’ 

Lucas shook his head. ‘You worked hard on it. You shouldn’t go that far. I still feel a bit weird about it, but I want to support you.’ 

‘Just keep in mind when you watch it that I wrote it about us. So every single cheesy line I wrote is for you only.’ Eliott was relieved that Lucas managed a small laugh at that and felt encouraged to carry on. ‘As for the rest of what you said. Lucille wasn’t a bad person but it didn’t work between us. Perhaps I was too hard on her but I’ve always felt you understand me far better than she did. I love the life you and I are building together and I’m not trying to escape it. That night last week was not a relief, I promise you.’ 

Lucas nodded and quietly took this in. He briefly looked relieved but the thoughtful frown quickly returned to his face. ‘I just can’t make sense of what happened. When you’re around alcohol with me and the guys, you’re careful. Then you go out once with Lola and go so crazy you get arrested and mess yourself up. I don’t understand, so all I can think is the worst.’ 

Eliott sighed. The memories of that night in the club were hazy but he remembered parts of it all too well. ‘Lola said things that scared me. She was angry at the people around her and it made me question…well, everything.’ He paused. ‘She knew about what happened on the boat, Lucas. It’s become a funny story that gets passed around, it seems. That hurt me to hear.’ 

Lucas’ already wide blue eyes managed to widen further. ‘I…I told the guys after it happened…I was freaked out, that’s all. I didn’t mean to…’ 

‘I don’t blame you for telling your friends. It’s the thought of them laughing about it behind my back that gets to me.’ 

‘No! Eliott, Bas thought it was funny and I guess Lola heard it from him or Daph. But his mother has Bipolar. It’s not a big deal for him to talk about that, it’s always been part of his life. He wouldn’t be mocking you. All the guys love you! You have to know that by now.’ 

Eliott considered this for a moment. He couldn’t deny that the guys as well as the girls had always been kind and welcoming towards him, actually to the point of screaming with joy when they saw him (Arthur was especially bad for this). 

‘They feel bad they couldn’t help with your film,’ Lucas continued. ‘They want to come and see it.’ 

‘That’s cool of them,’ smiled Eliott. ‘They have all been good to me. I didn’t mean to doubt them.’ 

‘Did you doubt me?’ Lucas asked. ‘When Lola was saying things…did she say anything about me?’ 

Eliott looked away and rubbed the bridge of his nose. He had already promised not to hide things from his partner anymore (as he had done recently about the Urbex parties). It meant that even though he wished he could hide this and spare Lucas’ feelings, it wasn’t an option anymore. ‘Yes. She did make me doubt us.’ He turned back and watched the disappointment form in Lucas’ eyes. Eliott quickly put a hand over his. ‘Lucas, I knew I shouldn’t have. I knew deep down even then that it was wrong and she didn’t understand us. But it’s difficult when you’ve been insecure for so long. Sometimes it comes back and catches you off-guard. For that moment, I couldn’t deal with it.’ He ran his thumb back and forth over Lucas’s hand gently. Lucas’ silence was worrying but Eliott waited quietly. 

‘I get that too. Feeling insecure,’ Lucas finally whispered. ‘Maybe because of my dad leaving and not even talking to me anymore now…sometimes I feel like everyone will do that to me in the end. You, my friends…everyone who ever gets to know me.’ 

‘My love,’ Eliott replied softly. He took his hand from Lucas’s and wrapped an arm around his shoulders, pulling Lucas to his chest. ‘Your dad’s fucked-up choices are nothing to do with you. You’ve had problems with your friends in the past but they always stick by you. And me….I’ll stick by you for as long as you can put up with me.’ 

‘That could be a very long time though.’ 

‘Good.’ Eliott managed to kiss the top of Lucas’ head through the wild hair. ‘I don’t want you to ever think I’m bored of you or us. I don’t want you to be afraid to talk to me or call me out if something hurts you. I don’t want us to be afraid of each other anymore.’ 

Lucas nodded against him. ‘Same goes for me.’ He looked up and Eliott felt as though his heart might jump out of his chest. He realised that whatever had been missing between them for a short while was on the way back. He was determined they wouldn’t lose it again. He kissed Lucas on the lips and forehead. ‘Don’t ever doubt that I love you. Please don’t ever doubt that.’ 

Lucas kissed him back. ‘You know I love you too. Always.‘ A smile lit his face. He looked happier than he had done in weeks. ‘Hey, how crazy is this? Us talking about things instead of just yelling at each other sometimes.’ 

Eliott beamed back at him. ‘Very crazy. Let’s try this more often than the yelling. I expect our neighbours would be glad of that too.’ He stood and pulled Lucas up after him. ‘Are you ready to go home?’ 

‘Yeah. I’m ready.’ They gripped each other’s hands. 

When they got as far as the doorway, Lucas stopped them and turned around for a last look back. ‘Hey, it might have been an excuse, but I did really like the view from up here.’ 

Eliott looked down at his boyfriend and smiled. ‘That’s surprising. And I might keep that in mind.’ 

  


**

**Author's Note:**

> I had to write this after the ending of season 6 for some comfort! It was the first season I've watched in "real time" and have very mixed feelings about it (not that I didn't like Lola, I thought she was a fantastic character). I love that fans are writing the proper Elu communication that the show didn’t give and this was just my idea for it. There may be another chapter at some point. Thanks for reading! It’s my first try at Skam France fic, please go easy on me...


End file.
